Saturday, March 2, 2013

Short Poems of Mine: Healing





(1) ONE MORE DAY
One more day/ just one more day
BE PATIENT/ closer to your goal/
Then another day/ another one more/ and more
...then you shall prevail.

#Never lost hope. No matter how difficult it seem to you
(Jakarta: 1/3/2013)
 

(2) HEALING TIME
Let time heals all the wounds
The Sun will shine again/ Tomorrow
Your pool of tear will finally dry/ One day
Remember to the END of Your journey/ Embarking to the end of destiny
A place with no name/ Which no one have ever visited before.
(Jakarta: 2/3/2013)

 

(3) A NEW DAY

The sun is shining/ A new day has just opened.

Do not lay down too long/ Nothing more to worry.
Last night was only a dream/ A scary one/  But you now should forget.
Wake up girl!
Draw a new plan/ Wish a new hope.
Bismillah.

(Jakarta: 3/3/2013)


Monday, October 29, 2012

Strong family binding in Pakistan: A blessing or a curse for women?


Last month, early October 2012, I had a chance to visit Pakistan for Raising Her Voice Peer Learning, and learn from many amazing resource persons from among the women leaders, human right activists, NGO activists as well as ordinary women in Jhelum, Sialkot and Lahore. Referring to my readings, discussions as well as observation in the field, I got the sense that Pakistan society is indeed has a very strong family binding. The strong family binding is not limited to nuclear family, but also includes immediate relatives, distant relatives, tribe members, friends, and neighbours. Loyalty to the family comes before other social relationship.


For women life strong family binding culture can be seen as two sides of a coin: it is a blessing in one side and a curse on the other side. The blessing side is the family’s social protection to women. When a father passed away, the elder brother of the family takes responsibility to take care of his sisters and the younger brothers. A divorced woman can always return to the family house for support.

One of my friend who has been living in Pakistan for 3 years, told me about the positive of strong family binding in awe. As a development worker he has travelled a lot to many places in Pakistan, he admired how family can play a role as a reliable social safety net for some one in crisis – when they are divorced by the husband, left by the father, threatened by other family or experienced a business turn down – they can always seek protection from the extended family. A woman can find a haven in the family house: shelter, foods, and sometime also some monthly allowance.

Typically a Pakistani family has big members consists of a father, a mother, male children and their wives, unmarried girls, grandchildren, and sometime some other relatives in one house. Gender based division of household tasks are common. All the grown up girls and daughter in laws are normally responsible for cooking and clean up the house. On the other hand the father and the brothers are responsible to earn money for the family. In a family structure, the elders have more powerful authority than the younger ones. On the top of the family structure sits a mother who is well respected by all family members.

Considering the family structure and division of task, a girl is considered as less valuable than the boy. It is because when the girl grown up, she will leave the family serving her husband’s family. While on the other side, a boy will keep staying in the family after married and is supposed to play a role as the family backbone i.e. working to earn family income and protect the family from harm. 

Since the family plays as a basic of social structure in Pakistan society, individual identity will always relate to the family. And here comes the curse part: individual choice – especially for women – is frequently considered as less important than collective family decision. Under such situation, arranged married and exchange married are common. The family prefers to strengthen their family binding trough arranged married. However when close family married can not be arranged, when married into an acquaintance family can not be avoided, they will prefer to have an exchange married. A girl married the brother of her sister in law, as an exchange for the brother married. This arrangement is done to ensure that their in law will take good care of their daughter. This whole system shows that factually a woman is married to the whole family member – not only to the husband. Marrying a family is much more complex than marrying a single individual. Power relation within the family will involve a woman with multi power holders – the husband, mother in law, father in law, brothers in law, sisters in law, uncle, aunt, nieces, nephews and so on. Under such complex power relation within a house, a young married woman is prone to subject of harassment and violence by other more powerful power holders in the family.   

In one of the RHV peer review meeting I met Afdah, a young woman whom just divorced by his husband. Her divorce shows a complex power relation within her family. Afdah married was arranged by the family, this is something common in Pakistan. However her married was not a typical arrange married, she was arranged to married a guy whose sister married to Afdah’s brother. In short she is the victim of exchange married. Later when Afdah’s brother got divorced with his wife, Afdah’s husband was forced by his extended family to divorce her as an act of revenge.
Having no body to support, she is now staying in Darul Aman – a shelter centre provided by local government of Jhelum – while filling the case against her ex husband for family income support.



There are many cases worst than Afdah’s. Aurat Foundation recorded 8.539 cases of violence against women in Pakistan in year 2011 only. Those violence acts are included forced marriage, domestic violence, acid throwing, kidnap, murder, rape, honor killing and other kind of violence. Since 2009 Oxfam Pakistan and it’s partner – Aurat Foundation – has been working restlessly to address those issues though Raising Her Voice Project. In the ground they increased the awareness of women of their rights through community action committees. They also smarty played advocacy strategy by forming joined influential women forums called “50 woman leaders”. The “50 woman leaders” consist of influential women who play leadership in diverse arenas as such teachers, health workers, social workers, government officials, lawyers, and member of parliaments. Through regular meetings women leaders discussed issues especially related to women’s rights and tried to find solution. When I was in Lahore, I was surprised of their incredible efforts in supporting the local government of Punjab to adopt a new law on Domestic Violence. Member of parliaments from different political parties as well as government officials we invited in a policy dialogue to support the policy.


Looking at 2011 data released by Aurat Foundation, I am aware that violence against women is still very serious problem in Pakistan. However I saw the work done by Oxfam in Pakistan and Aurat Foundation through RHV project have been achieve so many changes. It make me optimistic that the situation will be changed in the near future.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Opening the Door for Papuan Women to be Enterprise Leaders


On 4 – 9 of September 2012 we went to Nabire Papua. Physically Papua looks a bit different from the rest of Indonesia. Geographically this is the largest province in the country with high percentage of virgin forest. On the contrary it has the lowest population density, inhabited by 2.851.999 people only. 



Interesting to know that even though it has less than 3 million inhabitants but they have more than 300 ethnic groups with their own distinct culture. Considering the very diverse languages, Bahasa Indonesia is therefore playing a crucial function as intermediary language use by the people to communicate to each other from different ethnicity. Wherever we go we can communicate with Papuan by using simple Bahasa Indonesia.


According to statistical data 31,11 percent of the province population -- or 996.590 citizens – live bellow national poverty line. This means every 3 persons in Papua 1 out of them are poor, such a huge poverty number. Seeing around the villages and the streets we can confirm the high rate of poverty there, people wore very simple and sometime torn cloths and have very poor housings.



However I did not see cases of extreme poverty in term of people having difficulty in getting daily staple foods.  One of the native Papuan, Mr Hey, said that in the province, people do not worry about their foods because they have wide fertile land and people can just plant their foods or collecting herbs from the nearby forest.




The current basic problem of native Papuan therefore are not regarding to lack of food availability. It is more on food habit. Even though their land provides sweet potato, yam and cassava they prefer to consume rice which have to be imported from Java. Second problem is regarding to basic needs and facilities they can’t produced by them self as such cloths, health services, medicines, and education services.



Other important problem for Native Papuan is relating to their lack of competitive urge. Blessed by rich natural resources, fertile land, and easy access to foods, Native Papuans do not worry of food shortage. Thus they do not see the point of saving capital and consequently loss their appetite for economic competition. Instead of saving money, they prefer to invest in social capital. Distributing to their neighbors once they have more harvest in their land. This is among the difficulty for Papuan stay in the highland to develop entrepreneur behavior.  



Under such circumstance Oxfam introduced Enterprise Development Program (EDP). The EDP has quite ambitious objective which is to increase households’ income of indigenous Papuan through local economic development. It is hope that the economic activities will increase family income which at the end will be able to fulfil fundamental rights of indigenous Papuan as such rights to education, health, economic and social justice.   

One of the small enterprises supported by the EDP project is PAME Mandiri. It has the ambition for promoting Papuan organic coffee produced center highlands nationally which therefore will be able to increase the quality life of native Papuan especially women.
I think in the future, PAME Mandiri is potentially growing into a leading coffee producer. First reason is the company strategic location. PAME located in Nabire which considered as easily access town, plays as transit spots for other districts in central Papua to travel outside. PAME Mandiri can also easily access highland Arabica farmers whom stay in nearby mountainous districts of Paniai, Dogiai, Deiyai and Pegunungan Bintang. Second reason is product quality. Fertile land of Papua highland has enabled coffee farmers to grow organic coffee easily. With the technical skills supported by Oxfam, PAME Mandiri is capable to support native Papuans to plant and harvest coffee properly. 


It is the best time for Oxfam to promote native Papuan women leadership in entrepreneurship. Current director of PAME Mandiri is a young native woman named Veni Tanati. Veni together with Roselina Rumbiak – the founders – are very promising in their capability as entrepreneurs. Coming from Papua seashore culture, Veni and Roselina, did not face significant social and cultural problem. On the contrary John Tatogo – one of PAME staffs – faces a more serious problem to change his entrepreneurship spirit. Originally from highland district of Paniai, John has difficulty in saving money and starting an individual business. Under strong communnalism, there is a social pressure for John to share more money for the communal needs.

Considering those socio-cultural context, Oxfam’s EDP program for native Papuans therefore needs to be done step by step with strong dedication of field officers. This is because we are working to transform a big change by introducing entrepreneurship spirit – which normally grows in an individual capitalist environment – into a community still embracing communal culture. I am happy our Papua area office understands the situation completely, and develops strategic programs to address the challenges. Simple programs as such literacy course, personal planning, and family financial management are indeed very important to be introduced to our beneficiaries.








Monday, September 17, 2012

"Bored": a great energy for a change!


Bored. I am sure you have ever felt bored in your life for different reasons. In what situation did you feel bored? Because you are doing the same thing repeatedly? Because you have to follow strict rules all the time? Because you have to deal with unpleasant persons in most of your time? Because what your good intention to serve people are not respected? The list can be longer and longer as we always find many reasons for being bored.

I think the bored session for me is always how deep I involve in something. If I am involved and had a freedom to say something for its direction, I would not bored. Instead I would bored if I am not involved and just had to follow whatever policy decided for me. Having freedom of expression, of choice, of creativity --- would absolutely make me alive.

I never bored in my personal life, for instance. I have clear living purpose. I have a clear vision of what I should achieve in life. I have set of value from the Qur'an and the Hadist which clearly guide me on how to live a good life.  I therefore never bored with my family life. I and my husband have good relationship, regularly discussing on the family matter and are agreed on most of the vision of our life.

If there are bored sessions, it mostly related to working experiences. I guess that because I was simply an employer and had no space for leading the company I work with. Unlike my family which I am the driver of it's vision and how to achieve the vision, in the workplace I am simply an employee no matter what my position was and how high I was paid. I had no room for expressing my true self, and often unable to participate in the creation of the company vision, mission and strategic direction. I felt I was not being myself in the company I worked with, I was no longer exist being absorbed by the company direction. I think that is the core of my working stress. 

The company vision was normally represented by its director/ managers. A good director/ manager inspires and gives room for creativity. A good manager even can retain employee from move out with less offering than the competitor. At once time I had a very good manager which give room for my creativity and new ideas. He ensured me that I had that freedom, and even said that if I had problems with other directors/ bosses I can always seek his help. At the end I decided to stay even though I was offered a strategic position with double salary income in other company. 

Beside this very good manager, I was also had previous experience with a very bad boss. As a fresh graduate I was in a situation for need a job badly, thus when a small company hire me I did not negotiate for the job description as well as the salary rate. I even did not mind to have a very demanding boss. He demanded for a total loyalty, with no room for my personal decision over work. When I was done with my job and thus requested to support other division which I agreed to, he was angry saying that I went out of office without his permission. He demanded me to consult him even for a small move. I was exhausted and felt very stupid. Even so it needs two year for me to say: enough and move forward.

Now it has been more than fourteen years I am working as an employee since 1998. I need a change, a radical change to be more free in determining my own life. I feel the need for a bigger self expression, self direction and want to fly as high as an eagle. It does not about lack of respect and appreciation anymore which make me bored. It is because I do not feel I have the room for directing right now. I do feel like I am just an ordinary staff who need to consult in advance for whatever move I want to make. I do not have the proud of setting up agenda and then proudly claim as my achievement. I think it is the best time for me to change direction. To be the boss for my own self!!!! And I should be able to take a risk. Because life is about our bravery in taking risk. Never afraid of failure because, you can always try again whenever you fall. Bismillah...I am ready!!!!   

    

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Vietnam Travelogue: Get to Know Vietnamese Culture of Working Hard


Remembering Vietnam is good memories about my Vietnamese close friends during the University days. In my mind Vietnam is always associated with hard work and discipline. I always admire how Son, Huong, Kwang, Cuong, and Thanh worked very hard and very serious in their study. They would always back to the campus soon after dinner: sitting seriously in the library or at other places around the campus area for reading books or did school assignments. It is only at the weekend they would gather near the green garden along the riverbank of Barangka - Marikina, having chat and laugh over san miguel beers.

I remember how was Son trying to be the number one at every study, and he did it very well by getting grade A for many of subjects ^.^ I remember how was Kwang insisting to take another English course to improve his language skill, even I thought he already did it well. So Vietnam for me is identical with strong courage, hard work and serious efforts.

When I finally visited Hanoi this November 2010, my initial impression was reconfirm: Vietnamese is indeed hard worker. Once I listened from the radio about a Vietnamese  whom confessed (in English) that his succeed was especially inspired by "the Vietnamese culture which always believe that only by sacrificing hardwork you will gain succeed".

a woman selling flowers, a frequent sight in Hanoi streets

a handicap girl making a traditional vietnamese handicraft

When I visited temple of literature I got more understanding about this hard working culture. At the temple you will see many image of turtles from stone. At the back of these turtles you would see many names written in a piece square stone. These names were schollars at the Ly dinasty whom had accomplished their study to the highest level. Some names were erased from the stone---you could see their character still there but were not really clear---means that the persons did something dishonor during their life.

doctors monument

temple of literature

two dragons guarded a worship place

worshipping scholar in temple of literature


The culture of hard working can also be seen every where: a man caryying water can in the field, a woman planted vegetable in a small abandon land beside the road and a young man offering to polish our shoes. More over in the office, you would see people seriously working and break only for lunch. Everyone regards hard working with honor, no wonder I did not see any beggar along the street i passed by. At many break occassions Vietnamese love to gather with their friends and drink beers. This hard working spirit apparently is the answer of the country great achievement with 7% annual economic growth since embarked the Doi Moi economic reform in 1986.


a girl selling traditional foods in her basket




cyclo

beautiful sight of lady selling flowers

drinking beer with close friends




I guess this character is influenced by the country history and also by its geographical condition. The history of Vietnamese heroism is trying to be conveyed through its monuments, museums, temples and of course history lectures in the schools. I went for a day tour around Hanoi: visiting Ho Chi Minh mausoleaum, temple of literature, and French Prison. The tour guide was told all the story of Vietnamese heroism during the Ly dinasty, the president Ho Chi Minh thought and way of living, as well as the Vietnamese Heroism against French colonial and later the USA occupation.


Ho Chi Minh mousoleaum


The history of Vietnam during old eras, before French colonial, was not exposing so much (or may be because I simply did not be able to see other museum?). They seems like more focusing on recent history when the Vietnamese and its greatest hero ---Ho Chi Minh---defeated France and the USA. This of course understandable as the Vietnamese was experiencing 1000 years bad time under the Chinese Han dynasty  protectorate since 2 BC. Being long time colonized by Han dynasty, Chinese culture and believe system were higly influence the Vietnamese.


Chinese influence architecture
traditional Vietnamese costume

History has taught Vietnamese to always under siege as so many countries had been tried to invade her. French colonialized this country for 80 years even though Vietnamese were never really surendered to the French. One resistance movement called Can Vuong was popularly known as strongly resisted the French power. Japanese briefly occupied the country in the mid of 1940s. It was a blessing in disguise for Vietnamese as Japanese was able to repel France from the land and triggered the revolutionary sentiments among the Vietnamese. In 1941 a revolutionary organization named Vietminh was built that enjoined by a popularly communist leader Ho Chi Minh. When Japanese lose the war, the Vietminh forces took control over most northen and central vietnam. France which tried to return back to Vietnam was facing tough resistance from the Vietminh and finally withdrawed from Vietnam in 1954.


french architecture in yellow

However after independent there were still other threats as the Paris cease agreement decided that the country to be divided into two separated countries. The northern part of Vietnam was lead by Ho Chi Minh and the Southern part was headed by a Chatolic and anti-communist Ngo Dinh Diem. Later the two Vietnamese countries engage into long time wars since 1954 - 1975. Vietnam communist North succeed in repelling the US from the land because it gained wide support from the people throuh the establishment of Vietcong. Aside of that Southern leader was not popular and even then assasinated by his own people.

ho chi minh


Those stories were clearly conveyed by the tour guide during my visit. He proudly show the prison in which the Vietnamese were able to shot down 32 American airoplanes and prisoned their pilots. One of the most popular inmates during that time is John Mc Case whom is now US senator from the Republican Party.

The repeated victories over France, Vietnam Southern country, and then America had given significant pride to the country and its people. I believe that this history has given national confidence to the people of Vietnam and inspiring for a discipline and hard working spirit that currently we can see among its people. It is also understandable that they always feel under constant threat as Chinese was once again try to invade the country in 1979 after Vietnam briefly occupied Cambodia.


hanoi hilton, detention place for the American pilots

one good cornet of the prison, as I dont like the sad side of the place

Vietnam communis is applying a single party system. Overall the country has 3000 party members. Comparing to its 86 million citizens the party members seem like very small, but they are very powerful. The most powerful decision making is the Communist politbureau which consists of 15 leaders. They control the governments both executive brach (people committees) and the legislative branch (people councils). The party also has strong control over civil society organizations throuh its mass organizations as such youth union, woman union, farmers union and so on.


Vietnamese police

The communist teaching doesn't encourage people to be religious because it believe that religion as discouraging revolutionary spirits againts opression of the capitalists. No wonder most of the Vietnamese doesn't not associate with any religion. Many of my friends also told me that they are atheist, do not believe in God. One source said that only 20 percent of the Vietnamese consider them self as having religion. During my travel around Hanoi and along the way to Halong Bay, I hardly saw any religious building. The French missionaries were able to proselite about ten of thousands Vietnamese especially in the Southern part but many of them flewn out the country after the end of Vietnamese war. Still they are a number of Christians in Vietnam especially in the Southern part of the country. In Vietnam Moslem identifies with Cham etnic in the Southern and Central part of the country. Wonder whether there is Vietnamese Moslim in Hanoi because its only 1 mosque in Hanoi and most of the atendances are said to be foreigners.
one budhis statute at the one pillar pagoda

some budhist devotees among a small number of people practicing religion  


eventhough not religious but most of the Vietnamese remember their ancestors by giving this kind of offering 
respecting elder people

Going around the city of Hanoi you will be greeted by thousands of motorcyle along its dense streets. Motorcle seems like the most convenience vehicle in this city as the city is not so big, the streets are narrow and it is rather difficult to find proper parking lot for cars. You can always see many pretty ladies with nice fashion style in the street driving motorcycle.


motorcycle as the most convenient tranportation for in Hanoi

this girl read text messages while driving vehicle

In the streets you can still easily find exotic sights of traditional flavor. A lady wearing traditional hat while selling vegetable in her baskets. Chinese style red paper lantern every where. Chinese character on the building and so on.




selling around fruits

selling around flowers

I went around to the city at one afternoon, a little bit confuse because not many Vietnamese speak english. However I asked someone from the hotel to get me a Honda (motorcycle drive), went around the city for about 2 hours for 5 USD. It was nice one. You can see green big threes along the city old quarter streets, you can see old buildings along the streets, many golden star flags waving here and there, while at other corner you can see some parlors do haircuts under the threes.

did haircut in the corner of a street


I visited Hoan Kim Lake in the midle of the city. It seems like a wedding session now as many people there in the lake are taking their pre wedding pictures.

before pre wedding picture taken

pre wedding photos around Hoan Kim lake



I visited old quarter of the city. I did not really like it because it was crowded and busy with many people selling things in the street. One vendor selling matches was approaching me, offering four matches for one million dong. Still confuse with the value of Dong, I bargain for 600.000 dong. He automatically gave it. Sensing that it still very expensive I took only one for 200.000 dong. Lately he offered again other mathces two pieces for the same price. Finally I noticed that this vendor has overcharged me and I refused to buy anything else there.... Later I consulted somebody near the hotel and found out that the vendor had overcharged me four times :(  A friend of mine Hai later advise me: please do go around Hanoi but remember dont buy anything from the street. Its better to buy anything from shopping malls because they set fix price for everything.

Its only three malls in Hanoi, and the biggest one is Vietcom mall. People seem doesn't really keen to buy things from malls because there are many small shops selling good things with ratinable price. Well as long as you know the standard and you know how to bargain :)

I went to Halong bay for one day tour. It was really amazing: the bay was so serene with beautiful limestone hills, blue sky, and clear water. People did kayaking or went to a small boat to wander around the bay and visit some of it caves.


Halong bay



The native were living in a floating village, with so many boat houses. Some of the women sold fruits and vegetables in their boats and pedal around to approach visitors.




selling fruits and vegetables with boat in halong bay



kayaking along serene bay in halong

nice foods during lunch in the boat

kayaks and small boats for rent: USD 5 each per head

floating house

floating village


a new friend I met from Bulgaria, Alexandrova. we undertood each other eventhough she could not speak english

There is wonderful natural caves in the halong bay areas. I visited only one cave that believe to be the most beautiful called as "way to heaven cave". All the stalactits and stalacmits were so amazing, as colorful lights improved their dramatic looks.








Well overall Vietnam has impressed me. The travelling has taught me on how we need to be working hard, discipline, serious and open minded in order to achieve our goal. My goal in this life might be different with them as now I am not thinking that success should be measured by economic development and materialism achievements. Yet still I has learned something: one vision needs to be materialized in many creative ways to encourage people move in that direction.


TRAVELLING TIP:
If we only have one or two days chance to see around one country, its better to do it though a tour group. Cheaper and more effective. The tour agent knows the best which part of the country need to be seen and the tour guide can explain us more about the place we visit. I went sight seeing Halong bay and Hanoi with a tour group and it was funny to found out that all of the tour members paid different fee. A Chinese lady paid USD 44, a Swedish coupel paid USD 26 each, while me I got the cheapest by paying only USD 19. Apparently every hotel and travel agent charged different price for the tour. It is good that a friend from Oxfam office recommend me to one trusted cheap tour agent named TheSinh Tourist agent. It was also not less funny to know that there are over a hundred copies of TheSinh Tourist agent in Hanoi which have no correlation at all with the original one.


friends I met during the halong bay tour from Canada, the Philippines and Korea

So here I am happily sharing to you the address of the original TheSinh Tourist here so if you happened to visit Vietnam you can rely to a trusted and cheap tour agent. TheSinh Tourist Office I: # 52 Luong Ngoc Quyen St, Hanoi (Tel: (04) 3926.1568; 3926.3340; 3926.3341). TheSinh Tourist office II: # 64 Tran Nhat St. Hanoi. (Tel: (04) 3929.0394; 3929.0395). If you visit Hanoi do not forget to see the most beautiful Halong bay and go down the street to see ladies selling beautiful fresh flowers. Thats all so lovely about Vietnam!